Houseplant 9-1-1

We have a few houseplants that are in a bit of a state of emergency right now.

I have a thirsty little fern recuperating in our shower since the rest of our house seems to have no humidity despite the whole-house humidifier being turned up to its highest setting.

I have an aloe plant in desperate need of replanting into a larger pot.

And then I have this plant, which up until yesterday was thriving.  See it there in happier times, just trying to mind its own business on a table in our living room.  It has actually grown quite a bit since this picture was taken and is now really filling out.

Then yesterday afternoon my son came upstairs while I was working on my computer and said, "I have a surprise for you!  Close your eyes..."  When I opened them I saw this:

Do those leaves look familiar???  I came downstairs and found this sad specimen on the coffee table:

 My best guess for why he did this is that he was trying to put the leaves into one of our Tupperware containers like the rest of our produce.  They look a lot like spinach leaves, if spinach leaves were variegated.

I asked him why he cut all the leaves off and he said, "Well, I didn't cut them all off..."  (This is technically true, I suppose.)  Then he said, "I had to cut them.  It was my job!"  (Not really sure where that excuse came from.)

Does anyone know what to do with such a drastic plant haircut?  I am not sure if it will survive or not.  I guess we'll see...