Why do people hate fruitcake so much? I don't understand it. I think there are very few foods in the world that deserve scathing and mockery. After all, they are just foods.
This year I made fruitcake. Don't feel compelled to read this post if you are a hater. When I was buying all my ingredients at the grocery store, the clerk very politely said, "It looks like you're going to be baking!" I replied, "Yes, I'm making fruitcake." She became markedly less friendly and said, "Well, I hope you enjoy that." I do enjoy fruitcake. I wouldn't eat it all year, but I don't mind a piece around the holidays. Even if you don't like it, you should appreciate the time it takes to make a fruitcake. Here are the steps:
Step 1 - Assemble your ingredients
Step 2 - Chop up the fruits and nuts
(I used apricots, citron, orange, golden raisins, pecans, and walnuts. Save a few whole pieces to use in decorating the fruitcakes later.)
Step 3 - Mix everything together
Have fun mixing six pounds of dried fruits and nuts by hand!
Step 4 - Bake everything in a water bath for a few hours
Step 5 - Decorate the top of the fruitcakes with a few whole fruits and nuts and then brush a glaze over everything
Step 6 - Wrap up the fruitcakes and store them in airtight containers in a cool, dry, dark place for a few weeks
Step 7 - Wrap each fruitcake in parchment paper
Step 8 - Package your fruitcake (I used cellophane bags, but you could also use a tin, some tissue paper over the parchment paper, ribbon, etc.)
Step 9 - Add a tag and attach it with a sticker with a slight subliminal message ("You will gain great joy from this festive loaf.")
Step 10 - Enjoy your fruitcake and learn not to let other people's food negativity spoil your snack
P.S. If anyone wants the actual recipe, leave me a comment and I will happily post it.
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